








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 446 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1252 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 730 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 200 | 27% |
| Smokes | 189 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 172 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 169 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $373,988 of utility $167 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 396 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | clover | 88% | 8 |
| #2 | Vortal | 61% | 33 |
| #3 | Tosha | 60% | 91 |
| #4 | Luna | 59% | 32 |
| #5 | WOLFSEGGS | 56% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tosha | 9 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | WOLFSEGGS | 4 | 0.0124 |
| #3 | Vortal | 3 | 0.0047 |
| #4 | Luna | 3 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | clover | 3 | 0.0201 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tosha | 461 | 0.25 | 12 min |
| #2 | b_mbyz | 83 | 0.33 | 2 min |
| #3 | Vortal | 60 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | WOLFSEGGS | 55 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #5 | clover | 25 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | b_mbyz | +4.81 | 64 | 70 |
| #2 | clover | +3.66 | 68 | 55 |
| #3 | WOLFSEGGS | +0.90 | 49 | 28 |
| #4 | Vortal | +0.54 | 37 | 48 |
| #5 | 05enko | +0.48 | 42 | 23 |





