








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
263 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 236 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 115 | 49% |
| Smokes | 9 | 4% |
| HE Grenades | 77 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 35 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $16,147 of utility $36 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Milk is clear | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | Bryn | 100% | 5 |
| #3 | jono the joburg boet | 86% | 14 |
| #4 | aidanxa | 85% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Milk is clear | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | Bryn | 100% | 5 |
| #3 | jono the joburg boet | 86% | 14 |
| #4 | aidanxa | 85% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jono the joburg boet | 4 | 0.0153 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aidanxa | 57 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #2 | jono the joburg boet | 44 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #3 | Milk is clear | 14 | 0.21 | 0 min |
| #4 | Bryn | 8 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bryn | +6.67 | 94 | 45 |
| #2 | aidanxa | +4.98 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | jono the joburg boet | +4.58 | 64 | 38 |
| #4 | Milk is clear | +1.77 | 98 | 62 |
| #5 | pepper195 | -0.36 | 64 | 40 |





