








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 58 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 93 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2025 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,944 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1280 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1798 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 933 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 933 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $452,575 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | pickle barrel | 85% | 13 |
| #2 | via | 60% | 45 |
| #3 | kannh | 54% | 68 |
| #4 | Nomless | 52% | 27 |
| #5 | CycloneSpin | 50% | 206 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | CycloneSpin | 50% | 206 |
| #6 | Arcueid | 48% | 174 |
| #7 | Meepless | 47% | 170 |
| #8 | minyun | 44% | 16 |
| #9 | WhipeeDip | 35% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CycloneSpin | 20 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | Arcueid | 11 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Meepless | 5 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | WhipeeDip | 4 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CycloneSpin | 567 | 0.14 | 14 min |
| #2 | Meepless | 436 | 0.13 | 12 min |
| #3 | Arcueid | 299 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| #4 | via | 236 | 0.27 | 5 min |
| #5 | kannh | 169 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Meepless | +1.53 | 62 | 58 |
| #2 | WhipeeDip | +0.73 | 56 | 62 |
| #3 | CycloneSpin | +0.62 | 48 | 50 |
| #4 | Nomless | +0.58 | 75 | 41 |
| #5 | kannh | +0.37 | 64 | 50 |





