








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 104 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 73 matches | ||
| Faceit | 24 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1681 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,945 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1180 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1309 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1335 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 1121 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $283,600 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Latepate | 62% | 13 |
| #2 | 6 6 6 SoNNi | 60% | 20 |
| #3 | jutosu17 | 60% | 52 |
| #4 | Koljander M4Kk | 53% | 15 |
| #5 | JoonaNd | 53% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | jutosu17 | 60% | 52 |
| #4 | Koljander M4Kk | 53% | 15 |
| #5 | JoonaNd | 53% | 32 |
| #6 | MHanssen | 47% | 70 |
| #7 | Lex | 47% | 70 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MHanssen | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | jutosu17 | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #3 | Koljander M4Kk | 2 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | 6 6 6 SoNNi | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lex | 174 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #2 | MHanssen | 153 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #3 | JoonaNd | 138 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #4 | 6 6 6 SoNNi | 80 | 0.18 | 2 min |
| #5 | Koljander M4Kk | 48 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Latepate | +4.67 | 86 | 57 |
| #2 | HYP3 | +3.25 | 81 | 61 |
| #3 | JoonaNd | +1.54 | 81 | 71 |
| #4 | jutosu17 | +0.05 | 63 | 42 |
| #5 | 6 6 6 SoNNi | -0.40 | 60 | 57 |





