










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 913 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 251 matches | ||
| Faceit | 161 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5538 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,594 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5083 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3990 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3093 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 4428 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,838,561 of utility $165 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 145 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ResuN_ffs | 69% | 90 |
| #2 | Saxon | 66% | 32 |
| #3 | amanda | 64% | 28 |
| #4 | | Cookie | | 64% | 47 |
| #5 | ✪ returN | 63% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | amanda | 64% | 28 |
| #4 | | Cookie | | 64% | 47 |
| #5 | ✪ returN | 63% | 43 |
| #6 | perfectllama | 57% | 61 |
| #7 | amy♡✿ | 52% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ResuN_ffs | 7 | 0.0040 |
| #2 | perfectllama | 4 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | amy♡✿ | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Saxon | 1 | 0.0014 |
| #5 | amanda | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | amy♡✿ | 338 | 0.21 | 11 min |
| #2 | | Cookie | | 216 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #3 | amanda | 138 | 0.24 | 5 min |
| #4 | ResuN_ffs | 127 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #5 | ✪ returN | 112 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ returN | +2.74 | 87 | 66 |
| #2 | ecl11ps3 | +2.55 | 72 | 60 |
| #3 | amanda | +2.36 | 79 | 81 |
| #4 | | Cookie | | +2.07 | 80 | 70 |
| #5 | amy♡✿ | +1.01 | 71 | 77 |





