








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 636 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 439 matches | ||
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Wingman | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 82 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




75 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4950 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,086 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6442 | 34% |
| Smokes | 4217 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 4251 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 4176 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,477,638 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1138 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | headshot0% | 57% | 70 |
| #2 | Louie | 56% | 82 |
| #3 | Meggonen | 50% | 114 |
| #4 | [h^2a] Cherpyy | 47% | 38 |
| #5 | Helvijs Saukants | 47% | 96 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m0m3nt | 89 | 0.0101 |
| #2 | pinguSツ | 44 | 0.0081 |
| #3 | Meggonen | 32 | 0.0131 |
| #4 | Louie | 10 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | Helvijs Saukants | 6 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | m0m3nt | 1887 | 0.21 | 50 min |
| #2 | pinguSツ | 590 | 0.11 | 9 min |
| #3 | Helvijs Saukants | 440 | 0.22 | 14 min |
| #4 | Louie | 324 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #5 | headshot0% | 189 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | headshot0% | +1.36 | 74 | 54 |
| #2 | m0m3nt | +1.27 | 67 | 63 |
| #3 | [h^2a] Cherpyy | +1.02 | 71 | 47 |
| #4 | Louie | +0.42 | 65 | 54 |
| #5 | pinguSツ | +0.14 | 63 | 34 |





