








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 28 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1529 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,162 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 518 | 16% |
| Smokes | 421 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 1281 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 942 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $254,848 of utility $99 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 28 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Broseph | 61 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #2 | Timmy | 40 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | Rose | 34 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #4 | Andy | 34 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | Sammy | 33 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Andy | +8.13 | 90 | 72 |
| #2 | scirocco | +6.98 | 96 | 63 |
| #3 | b4wked | +4.76 | 81 | 60 |
| #4 | Rise | +4.28 | 98 | 76 |
| #5 | Randillion | +3.86 | 91 | 70 |





