








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 24 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 116 matches | ||
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1958 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 506 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 272 | 54% |
| Smokes | 55 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 45 | 9% |
| Molotovs | 134 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $105,398 of utility $12 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 31 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Darkseus | 58% | 38 |
| #2 | Perry Da PlaTtypus | 57% | 30 |
| #3 | Rurouni | 54% | 142 |
| #4 | SilkyDumplings | 49% | 61 |
| #5 | WittyGamerHere | 49% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rurouni | 19 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | Arvid | 8 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | Perry Da PlaTtypus | 8 | 0.0127 |
| #4 | Darkseus | 7 | 0.0094 |
| #5 | WittyGamerHere | 6 | 0.0076 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Darkseus | +5.81 | 53 | 16 |
| #2 | Perry Da PlaTtypus | +4.83 | 59 | 29 |
| #3 | Rurouni | +3.64 | 49 | 50 |
| #4 | Blue's Clues | +1.30 | 44 | 35 |
| #5 | SilkyDumplings | +0.73 | 36 | 18 |





