








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1066 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 359 matches | ||
| Premier | 79 matches | ||
| Wingman | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Renown | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 77 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7006 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,272 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5289 | 27% |
| Smokes | 5419 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3359 | 17% |
| Molotovs | 5205 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,148,194 of utility $181 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 786 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cretin | 66% | 41 |
| #2 | zzz | 61% | 121 |
| #3 | zer0h aramco.com | 60% | 103 |
| #4 | Jamie | 60% | 181 |
| #5 | leon. | 59% | 117 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | zer0h aramco.com | 60% | 103 |
| #4 | Jamie | 60% | 181 |
| #5 | leon. | 59% | 117 |
| #6 | Jacob | 59% | 41 |
| #7 | myu | 56% | 326 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | myu | 26 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | zer0h aramco.com | 9 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | cretin | 7 | 0.0084 |
| #4 | Jamie | 4 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | leon. | 4 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | myu | 1469 | 0.21 | 32 min |
| #2 | leon. | 336 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #3 | zzz | 301 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #4 | Jamie | 240 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #5 | zer0h aramco.com | 151 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | air | +1.90 | 82 | 54 |
| #2 | zzz | +0.83 | 87 | 61 |
| #3 | Jacob | +0.80 | 73 | 66 |
| #4 | cretin | +0.76 | 70 | 57 |
| #5 | leon. | +0.40 | 79 | 59 |





