








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 919 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 65 matches | ||
| Premier | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




171 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2513 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,286 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2791 | 44% |
| Smokes | 1253 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 2036 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 206 | 3% |
Our logs show you have wasted $707,230 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 818 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pluto | 60% | 60 |
| #2 | Banan | 59% | 107 |
| #3 | Casper Krause | 57% | 251 |
| #4 | i am s1mple dimple | 55% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pluto | 60% | 60 |
| #2 | Banan | 59% | 107 |
| #3 | Casper Krause | 57% | 251 |
| #4 | i am s1mple dimple | 55% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Casper Krause | 226 | 0.0491 |
| #2 | Banan | 73 | 0.0371 |
| #3 | Pluto | 32 | 0.0286 |
| #4 | i am s1mple dimple | 15 | 0.0114 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Casper Krause | 1189 | 0.26 | 25 min |
| #2 | Banan | 242 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | Pluto | 150 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | i am s1mple dimple | 109 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Casper Krause | +3.75 | 64 | 50 |
| #2 | i am s1mple dimple | +3.28 | 52 | 32 |
| #3 | Khan Baba | +1.01 | 40 | 47 |
| #4 | Banan | +0.55 | 11 | 23 |
| #5 | Pluto | -0.24 | 34 | 24 |





