








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 701 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 13 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 36 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




86 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1262 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,652 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 810 | 31% |
| Smokes | 326 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 1086 | 41% |
| Molotovs | 430 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $542,953 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 392 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pluto | 69% | 35 |
| #2 | Casper Krause | 61% | 87 |
| #3 | i am s1mple dimple | 60% | 40 |
| #4 | Khan Baba | 59% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pluto | 69% | 35 |
| #2 | Casper Krause | 61% | 87 |
| #3 | i am s1mple dimple | 60% | 40 |
| #4 | Khan Baba | 59% | 107 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Casper Krause | 84 | 0.0536 |
| #2 | Khan Baba | 69 | 0.0355 |
| #3 | Pluto | 14 | 0.0208 |
| #4 | i am s1mple dimple | 11 | 0.0145 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Casper Krause | 433 | 0.28 | 9 min |
| #2 | Khan Baba | 411 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #3 | Pluto | 110 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | i am s1mple dimple | 63 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Casper Krause | +5.49 | 68 | 46 |
| #2 | i am s1mple dimple | +3.59 | 55 | 30 |
| #3 | Banan | +1.17 | 14 | 26 |
| #4 | Khan Baba | +1.05 | 39 | 48 |
| #5 | Pluto | +0.12 | 34 | 28 |





