








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 222 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




51 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1981 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,110 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 582 | 52% |
| Smokes | 157 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 173 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 198 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $258,421 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 483 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ReDMooN | 80% | 10 |
| #2 | hec | 71% | 14 |
| #3 | tA admirooo | 68% | 25 |
| #4 | soppy | 63% | 19 |
| #5 | EG CeRq | 61% | 101 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | cheeot | 58% | 12 |
| #7 | tA Naivist | 54% | 48 |
| #8 | cat attack 2001 | 53% | 30 |
| #9 | tA noelle | 38% | 37 |
| #10 | tA ouzous | 32% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tA Naivist | 41 | 0.0462 |
| #2 | tA noelle | 29 | 0.0432 |
| #3 | EG CeRq | 26 | 0.0132 |
| #4 | tA admirooo | 13 | 0.0278 |
| #5 | tA ouzous | 11 | 0.0162 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EG CeRq | 125 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #2 | tA admirooo | 116 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #3 | soppy | 98 | 0.29 | 2 min |
| #4 | hec | 60 | 0.25 | 2 min |
| #5 | ReDMooN | 57 | 0.32 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tA admirooo | +5.95 | 95 | 57 |
| #2 | EG CeRq | +4.04 | 81 | 35 |
| #3 | soppy | +3.99 | 86 | 52 |
| #4 | ReDMooN | +3.61 | 85 | 84 |
| #5 | hec | +3.48 | 76 | 57 |





