








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 894 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 181 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 37 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 25 matches | ||
| Wingman | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 26 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




38 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5180 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,803 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2213 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1992 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 869 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 2729 | 35% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,227,772 of utility $204 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1838 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P A I N | 23 | 0.0068 |
| #2 | Socks | 17 | 0.0072 |
| #3 | Himothy Jones | 9 | 0.0092 |
| #4 | _I_LIKE_PIE_ | 7 | 0.0065 |
| #5 | euphorica | 6 | 0.0088 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P A I N | 611 | 0.18 | 14 min |
| #2 | Socks | 377 | 0.16 | 9 min |
| #3 | Himothy Jones | 154 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| #4 | _I_LIKE_PIE_ | 152 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #5 | euphorica | 116 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aerw1ck | +3.07 | 74 | 61 |
| #2 | P A I N | +1.76 | 64 | 57 |
| #3 | Foxxy | +1.41 | 66 | 45 |
| #4 | Socks | -0.09 | 58 | 58 |
| #5 | Himothy Jones | -0.17 | 49 | 57 |





