








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 537 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 196 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3020 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,468 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1195 | 34% |
| Smokes | 864 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 957 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 452 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $513,586 of utility $103 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 422 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ruan | 60% | 47 |
| #2 | 104 | 52% | 52 |
| #3 | dam0n | 50% | 70 |
| #4 | fanta light | 43% | 63 |
| #5 | ℬℯℯ𝓏𝓎 | 41% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | 104 | 52% | 52 |
| #3 | dam0n | 50% | 70 |
| #4 | fanta light | 43% | 63 |
| #5 | ℬℯℯ𝓏𝓎 | 41% | 17 |
| #6 | Hypno-Toad | 38% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ruan | 22 | 0.0260 |
| #2 | 104 | 18 | 0.0186 |
| #3 | fanta light | 7 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | dam0n | 6 | 0.0044 |
| #5 | Hypno-Toad | 3 | 0.0042 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dam0n | 298 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #2 | Hypno-Toad | 259 | 0.36 | 6 min |
| #3 | 104 | 240 | 0.25 | 5 min |
| #4 | fanta light | 231 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #5 | ruan | 219 | 0.26 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | stunned posssum | +1.92 | 82 | 32 |
| #2 | ruan | +1.42 | 84 | 55 |
| #3 | fanta light | +1.02 | 73 | 65 |
| #4 | Hypno-Toad | +0.52 | 76 | 67 |
| #5 | dam0n | -0.55 | 68 | 62 |





