








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 6 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
850 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,212 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 986 | 45% |
| Smokes | 408 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 460 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 358 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $94,305 of utility $49 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 4 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jokusomali? | 57% | 14 |
| #2 | Aziz - Combat Fighter | 52% | 31 |
| #3 | Bot_waldo | 42% | 26 |
| #4 | dielikefenix | 41% | 37 |
| #5 | härski | 40% | 10 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | dielikefenix | 41% | 37 |
| #5 | härski | 40% | 10 |
| #6 | frankgrover | 33% | 18 |
| #7 | Mirjami | 32% | 19 |
| #8 | Äxdeeee2 | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aziz - Combat Fighter | 7 | 0.0112 |
| #2 | dielikefenix | 6 | 0.0082 |
| #3 | Äxdeeee2 | 6 | 0.0279 |
| #4 | Mirjami | 4 | 0.0109 |
| #5 | Jokusomali? | 3 | 0.0096 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dielikefenix | 164 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #2 | Jokusomali? | 75 | 0.24 | 2 min |
| #3 | frankgrover | 65 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #4 | Aziz - Combat Fighter | 55 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | Mirjami | 43 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jokusomali? | +4.92 | 71 | 64 |
| #2 | Aziz - Combat Fighter | +0.37 | 32 | 62 |
| #3 | dielikefenix | -0.25 | 48 | 54 |
| #4 | härski | -0.57 | 50 | 32 |
| #5 | Mirjami | -0.65 | 53 | 43 |





