








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 89 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 37 matches | ||
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
949 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,324 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 338 | 26% |
| Smokes | 437 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 267 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 282 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $432,174 of utility $197 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 73 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xia ling | 100% | 7 |
| #2 | Mike Oxmaul | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | SUURMANN | 56% | 9 |
| #4 | scuffuy | 54% | 41 |
| #5 | DOGmaster4566 | 46% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | adv1ce | 3 | 0.0138 |
| #2 | SUURMANN | 3 | 0.0148 |
| #3 | scuffuy | 2 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | DOGmaster4566 | 1 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Xia ling | +7.91 | 85 | 53 |
| #2 | adv1ce | +3.13 | 86 | 49 |
| #3 | confl1ct | +2.24 | 91 | 39 |
| #4 | Saul Goodman | +1.18 | 64 | 34 |
| #5 | SUURMANN | -0.44 | 60 | 51 |





