








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 509 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 311 matches | ||
| Faceit | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 46 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2783 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,360 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4360 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4201 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 4062 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 3737 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $869,587 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 248 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LKWFahrer_300KMH | 68% | 25 |
| #2 | Minztee | 64% | 25 |
| #3 | wOOlfi | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | ✪ DGF Pirex | 53% | 30 |
| #5 | Bifi13 | 53% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | wOOlfi | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | ✪ DGF Pirex | 53% | 30 |
| #5 | Bifi13 | 53% | 34 |
| #6 | Izuna | 49% | 39 |
| #7 | IronnN | 42% | 73 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wOOlfi | 5 | 0.0051 |
| #2 | ✪ DGF Pirex | 4 | 0.0064 |
| #3 | Bifi13 | 2 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | Minztee | 2 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | IronnN | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IronnN | 97 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #2 | LKWFahrer_300KMH | 91 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | wOOlfi | 88 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #4 | Bifi13 | 84 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | Minztee | 77 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LKWFahrer_300KMH | +3.78 | 80 | 67 |
| #2 | Bifi13 | +0.47 | 65 | 72 |
| #3 | Minztee | +0.02 | 63 | 48 |
| #4 | wOOlfi | -0.20 | 61 | 65 |
| #5 | ✪ DGF Pirex | -0.25 | 50 | 52 |





