








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 351 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 111 matches | ||
| Faceit | 77 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2649 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,981 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1727 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2257 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2917 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 2080 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,211,496 of utility $213 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 243 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | domlarN | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | Izuna | 67% | 18 |
| #3 | Exory | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | ixdeeexD | 54% | 28 |
| #5 | Purple_Haze | 53% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | p4rrotman | 44% | 71 |
| #10 | frEddl_ | 43% | 123 |
| #11 | Guter_Riecher | 32% | 37 |
| #12 | latzo | 31% | 16 |
| #13 | Tyt0_o | 27% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ DGF Pirex | 10 | 0.0038 |
| #2 | frEddl_ | 4 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Bifi13 | 3 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Guter_Riecher | 3 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | ixdeeexD | 3 | 0.0052 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | frEddl_ | 871 | 0.34 | 25 min |
| #2 | Bifi13 | 308 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | suw4t | 252 | 0.12 | 6 min |
| #4 | Exory | 241 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #5 | ✪ DGF Pirex | 207 | 0.08 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ixdeeexD | +0.99 | 86 | 53 |
| #2 | Bifi13 | +0.66 | 68 | 71 |
| #3 | p4rrotman | +0.56 | 76 | 60 |
| #4 | suw4t | +0.04 | 74 | 58 |
| #5 | domlarN | -0.05 | 83 | 57 |





