










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 136 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 99 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Wingman | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6535 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,213 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4483 | 37% |
| Smokes | 2746 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2408 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2576 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,464,256 of utility $239 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 554 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nottene | 57% | 197 |
| #2 | tonyzh1tåå | 54% | 145 |
| #3 | sorrin | 53% | 70 |
| #4 | potatoSIJOMANGUI | 53% | 254 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nottene | 57% | 197 |
| #2 | tonyzh1tåå | 54% | 145 |
| #3 | sorrin | 53% | 70 |
| #4 | potatoSIJOMANGUI | 53% | 254 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | potatoSIJOMANGUI | 7 | 0.0014 |
| #2 | nottene | 7 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | sorrin | 7 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | tonyzh1tåå | 6 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | potatoSIJOMANGUI | 525 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #2 | nottene | 248 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #3 | tonyzh1tåå | 124 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #4 | sorrin | 46 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ThoMa$ | +4.00 | 78 | 61 |
| #2 | tonyzh1tåå | -0.63 | 35 | 42 |
| #3 | potatoSIJOMANGUI | -0.86 | 57 | 55 |
| #4 | nottene | -1.22 | 63 | 42 |
| #5 | sorrin | -3.13 | 27 | 47 |





