








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1868 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 236 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 211 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 187 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 172 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 126 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 75 matches | ||
| Wingman | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 67 matches | ||
| Faceit | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




154 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
13785 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 32,731 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8972 | 27% |
| Smokes | 7001 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 9772 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 6986 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $7,565,625 of utility $227 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7132 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | foobe | 61% | 144 |
| #2 | Mizu | 60% | 106 |
| #3 | oeya | 54% | 94 |
| #4 | DinkMaster69 | 53% | 86 |
| #5 | SagesDope | 53% | 209 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | SagesDope | 53% | 209 |
| #6 | ✭𝖊𝖉𝖎𝖊𝖊✭ | 53% | 324 |
| #7 | 2c3nt.chump | 53% | 1474 |
| #8 | wicko45 | 51% | 162 |
| #9 | dames ツ | 49% | 266 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✭𝖊𝖉𝖎𝖊𝖊✭ | 189 | 0.0300 |
| #2 | 2c3nt.chump | 117 | 0.0040 |
| #3 | SagesDope | 66 | 0.0162 |
| #4 | oeya | 21 | 0.0115 |
| #5 | dames ツ | 18 | 0.0034 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 2c3nt.chump | 2748 | 0.09 | 62 min |
| #2 | dames ツ | 1590 | 0.30 | 36 min |
| #3 | ✭𝖊𝖉𝖎𝖊𝖊✭ | 1053 | 0.17 | 17 min |
| #4 | foobe | 607 | 0.21 | 13 min |
| #5 | SagesDope | 318 | 0.08 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✭𝖊𝖉𝖎𝖊𝖊✭ | +6.04 | 74 | 38 |
| #2 | foobe | +2.99 | 48 | 54 |
| #3 | 2c3nt.chump | +1.91 | 69 | 51 |
| #4 | SagesDope | +0.81 | 38 | 35 |
| #5 | oeya | -0.15 | 33 | 44 |





