








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 202 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 40 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




18 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1224 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,736 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 449 | 16% |
| Smokes | 835 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 550 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 902 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $646,452 of utility $254 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 7 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| 63% | 8 | ||
| 63% | 16 | ||
| 56% | 16 | ||
| #4 | Sh3W1llB3L0V3D | 44% | 71 |
| 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| 56% | 16 | ||
| #4 | Sh3W1llB3L0V3D | 44% | 71 |
| 36% | 14 | ||
| 33% | 12 | ||
| 31% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| 3 | 0.0094 | ||
| 3 | 0.0118 | ||
| #3 | Sh3W1llB3L0V3D | 2 | 0.0014 |
| 1 | 0.0033 | ||
| 1 | 0.0041 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sh3W1llB3L0V3D | 260 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| 62 | 0.24 | 2 min | ||
| 57 | 0.18 | 1 min | ||
| 28 | 0.09 | 1 min | ||
| 28 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| +2.36 | 88 | 36 | ||
| +1.40 | 77 | 64 | ||
| +1.36 | 90 | 41 | ||
| +0.82 | 80 | 37 | ||
| #5 | Sh3W1llB3L0V3D | +0.39 | 54 | 63 |





