








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 133 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 31 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
557 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,743 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 387 | 22% |
| Smokes | 345 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 464 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 547 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $97,025 of utility $73 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | 0libot | 64% | 11 |
| #8 | PASSIVEE | 63% | 8 |
| #9 | TrafficKnight☂ | 60% | 5 |
| #10 | Gregor the Belphegor | 53% | 30 |
| #11 | Quattrofun | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yersinia | 2 | 0.0182 |
| #2 | Gregor the Belphegor | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Quattrofun | 1 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | 0libot | 1 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | TrafficKnight☂ | 1 | 0.0091 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Yersinia | +7.34 | 47 | 43 |
| #2 | PASSIVEE | +2.99 | 69 | 73 |
| #3 | TrafficKnight☂ | +2.32 | 53 | 31 |
| #4 | l3on1das | +2.30 | 64 | 63 |
| #5 | katze kifft | +1.06 | 44 | 49 |





