








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 327 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 239 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 192 matches | ||
| Premier | 117 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 73 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 46 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 146 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




63 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5295 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,053 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3387 | 16% |
| Smokes | 5580 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 7094 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 4992 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,204,777 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ValdR | 62% | 125 |
| #2 | Seiba | 54% | 50 |
| #3 | El Primo | 53% | 315 |
| #4 | S1m0N | 43% | 139 |
| #5 | ✡︎ King Money ඞ | 42% | 117 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ValdR | 62% | 125 |
| #2 | Seiba | 54% | 50 |
| #3 | El Primo | 53% | 315 |
| #4 | S1m0N | 43% | 139 |
| #5 | ✡︎ King Money ඞ | 42% | 117 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Primo | 62 | 0.0100 |
| #2 | S1m0N | 36 | 0.0130 |
| #3 | ✡︎ King Money ඞ | 14 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | Seiba | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | ValdR | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Primo | 631 | 0.10 | 14 min |
| #2 | ✡︎ King Money ඞ | 430 | 0.18 | 12 min |
| #3 | ValdR | 148 | 0.06 | 5 min |
| #4 | S1m0N | 145 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #5 | Seiba | 101 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | El Primo | +3.26 | 70 | 63 |
| #2 | Seiba | +1.94 | 50 | 55 |
| #3 | S1m0N | +1.29 | 67 | 59 |
| #4 | ValdR | -0.20 | 26 | 54 |
| #5 | Harley Quinn | -1.38 | 33 | 48 |





