








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 628 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 211 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 168 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 113 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3681 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,160 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7142 | 24% |
| Smokes | 8369 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 8130 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 5519 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,866,727 of utility $131 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 685 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lil Pepo | 47% | 347 |
| #2 | UB | Colito | 45% | 337 |
| #3 | c0mplex | 42% | 176 |
| #4 | n | 39% | 152 |
| #5 | Chirola | 39% | 220 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | UB | Colito | 45% | 337 |
| #3 | c0mplex | 42% | 176 |
| #4 | n | 39% | 152 |
| #5 | Chirola | 39% | 220 |
| #6 | Fede Racing | 38% | 401 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | UB | Colito | 23 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | Lil Pepo | 22 | 0.0032 |
| #3 | c0mplex | 15 | 0.0043 |
| #4 | Chirola | 13 | 0.0029 |
| #5 | Fede Racing | 11 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fede Racing | 2105 | 0.26 | 56 min |
| #2 | Lil Pepo | 1706 | 0.24 | 45 min |
| #3 | UB | Colito | 996 | 0.14 | 24 min |
| #4 | c0mplex | 840 | 0.24 | 24 min |
| #5 | Chirola | 400 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lil Pepo | +8.96 | 68 | 74 |
| #2 | c0mplex | +1.98 | 27 | 78 |
| #3 | Chirola | +0.33 | 19 | 69 |
| #4 | n | -0.77 | 32 | 40 |
| #5 | DoGG1e | -2.55 | 13 | 66 |





