








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 513 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




60 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1968 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,281 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1931 | 37% |
| Smokes | 834 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1871 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 645 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $772,557 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 487 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pickle 🥒 | 67% | 24 |
| #2 | Hashman (❀ •̀ᴗ•́ ) | 53% | 17 |
| #3 | juice | 52% | 220 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pickle 🥒 | 67% | 24 |
| #2 | Hashman (❀ •̀ᴗ•́ ) | 53% | 17 |
| #3 | juice | 52% | 220 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | juice | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #2 | Pickle 🥒 | 2 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Hashman (❀ •̀ᴗ•́ ) | 2 | 0.0056 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | juice | 421 | 0.10 | 9 min |
| #2 | Hashman (❀ •̀ᴗ•́ ) | 97 | 0.27 | 3 min |
| #3 | Pickle 🥒 | 13 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pickle 🥒 | +3.32 | 72 | 51 |
| #2 | MORK | +0.13 | 39 | 41 |
| #3 | juice | -0.36 | 45 | 42 |
| #4 | Hashman (❀ •̀ᴗ•́ ) | -0.92 | 67 | 67 |





