








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 241 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 167 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




23 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2006 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,152 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2408 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1585 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1973 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2186 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $512,258 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 511 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NO SLEEP | 92% | 13 |
| #2 | echo | 85% | 20 |
| #3 | Grabblo | 80% | 25 |
| #4 | Wit | 68% | 22 |
| #5 | 나 돌아왔어 | 65% | 40 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Wit | 68% | 22 |
| #5 | 나 돌아왔어 | 65% | 40 |
| #6 | P E W P S A Q ®™ | 52% | 117 |
| #7 | Wax | 47% | 32 |
| #8 | Big Wag | 47% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Wax | 4 | 0.0056 |
| #2 | P E W P S A Q ®™ | 2 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | 나 돌아왔어 | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Grabblo | 1 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | Wit | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | P E W P S A Q ®™ | 272 | 0.10 | 6 min |
| #2 | Wax | 173 | 0.24 | 4 min |
| #3 | Grabblo | 164 | 0.27 | 4 min |
| #4 | echo | 162 | 0.37 | 4 min |
| #5 | Wit | 150 | 0.31 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | echo | +3.16 | 64 | 68 |
| #2 | 나 돌아왔어 | +2.19 | 70 | 60 |
| #3 | NO SLEEP | +1.75 | 66 | 55 |
| #4 | Grabblo | +0.78 | 54 | 66 |
| #5 | Wit | +0.58 | 58 | 64 |





