








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1122 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 252 matches | ||
| Wingman | 109 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 74 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1927 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,807 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 529 | 11% |
| Smokes | 906 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 2139 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 1233 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,954,989 of utility $241 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1386 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GermanMushroom2 | 57% | 28 |
| #2 | Tros76 | 52% | 23 |
| #3 | Cr4wl3r | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | malik | 41% | 39 |
| #5 | sledge_hammer_666 | 39% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Cr4wl3r | 50% | 22 |
| #4 | malik | 41% | 39 |
| #5 | sledge_hammer_666 | 39% | 85 |
| #6 | VirtualSamurai | 34% | 32 |
| #7 | Ⓢ︎Ⓘ︎Ⓖ︎Ⓖ︎Ⓘ | 31% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | malik | 4 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | sledge_hammer_666 | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | Ⓢ︎Ⓘ︎Ⓖ︎Ⓖ︎Ⓘ | 2 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | GermanMushroom2 | 1 | 0.0016 |
| #5 | Cr4wl3r | 1 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tros76 | 77 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #2 | Cr4wl3r | 51 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | Ⓢ︎Ⓘ︎Ⓖ︎Ⓖ︎Ⓘ | 31 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #4 | VirtualSamurai | 15 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #5 | sledge_hammer_666 | 8 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GermanMushroom2 | +1.62 | 67 | 44 |
| #2 | Tros76 | -0.58 | 41 | 60 |
| #3 | VirtualSamurai | -0.95 | 29 | 42 |
| #4 | sledge_hammer_666 | -1.03 | 16 | 32 |
| #5 | Ⓢ︎Ⓘ︎Ⓖ︎Ⓖ︎Ⓘ | -1.32 | 17 | 55 |





