








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 284 matches | ||
| Faceit | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2591 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 18,468 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5177 | 28% |
| Smokes | 6215 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 1223 | 7% |
| Molotovs | 5853 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $911,488 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 41 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Haydnsmovingcastle | 50% | 28 |
| #7 | Osiris | 46% | 272 |
| #8 | Flatland | 44% | 205 |
| #9 | Wonderboy | 40% | 50 |
| #10 | Fevereagle | 34% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Osiris | 6 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | Patler | 5 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | Flatland | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Wonderboy | 3 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | Haydnsmovingcastle | 2 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Patler | 963 | 0.15 | 25 min |
| #2 | Haydnsmovingcastle | 182 | 0.35 | 5 min |
| #3 | Flatland | 168 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #4 | Klets | 160 | 0.19 | 4 min |
| #5 | Wonderboy | 69 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Haydnsmovingcastle | +4.52 | 86 | 63 |
| #2 | Chief | +3.64 | 78 | 59 |
| #3 | TheSorcery | +1.85 | 61 | 22 |
| #4 | Fevereagle | +1.73 | 52 | 59 |
| #5 | Patler | +0.51 | 54 | 68 |





