








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 683 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Ancient | 188 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 147 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 115 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 85 matches | ||
| Wingman | 45 matches | ||
| Premier | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5513 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 31,483 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10805 | 34% |
| Smokes | 9853 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 7079 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3746 | 12% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,359,783 of utility $107 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 10395 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chicken - W1ng | 44% | 248 |
| #2 | Maribo | 41% | 63 |
| #3 | kawa | 39% | 109 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chicken - W1ng | 44% | 248 |
| #2 | Maribo | 41% | 63 |
| #3 | kawa | 39% | 109 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chicken - W1ng | 72 | 0.0154 |
| #2 | kawa | 11 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | Maribo | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chicken - W1ng | 1041 | 0.22 | 20 min |
| #2 | kawa | 372 | 0.18 | 7 min |
| #3 | Maribo | 139 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Maribo | +0.51 | 65 | 47 |
| #2 | kawa | +0.46 | 65 | 60 |
| #3 | Chicken - W1ng | -0.03 | 63 | 57 |
| #4 | Simsim2323 | -0.16 | 46 | 57 |





