








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 15 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
168 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 231 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 69 | 30% |
| Smokes | 61 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 69 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 32 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $14,023 of utility $20 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Acnologia | 53% | 17 |
| #2 | Jasag | 50% | 2 |
| #3 | Jaskadz | 50% | 4 |
| #4 | Racing Car Team || Maxi | 50% | 4 |
| #5 | Intel Core Ultra 9 285K | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Jaskadz | 50% | 4 |
| #4 | Racing Car Team || Maxi | 50% | 4 |
| #5 | Intel Core Ultra 9 285K | 33% | 18 |
| #6 | feiccaJK | 30% | 23 |
| #7 | Drifter | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | feiccaJK | 4 | 0.0090 |
| #2 | Intel Core Ultra 9 285K | 1 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | Acnologia | 1 | 0.0033 |
| #4 | Jaskadz | 1 | 0.0135 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | feiccaJK | 42 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #2 | Acnologia | 37 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #3 | Intel Core Ultra 9 285K | 12 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | Jaskadz | 6 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #5 | Drifter | 1 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jasag | +5.61 | 46 | 29 |
| #2 | Jaskadz | +4.46 | 91 | 56 |
| #3 | Acnologia | +2.82 | 57 | 45 |
| #4 | feiccaJK | +2.32 | 77 | 47 |
| #5 | Racing Car Team || Maxi | -1.53 | 32 | 20 |





