








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 127 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 24 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1320 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,962 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1121 | 28% |
| Smokes | 973 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1070 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 798 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $350,487 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 38 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TweeZ | 77% | 26 |
| #2 | ♛King♛ | 73% | 15 |
| #3 | HEz | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | NaystyX | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | SamSam | 55% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | HEz | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | NaystyX | 56% | 16 |
| #5 | SamSam | 55% | 11 |
| #6 | Mizzu | 52% | 67 |
| #7 | KasinonKuningas | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mizzu | 32 | 0.0268 |
| #2 | NaystyX | 7 | 0.0221 |
| #3 | HEz | 2 | 0.0095 |
| #4 | KasinonKuningas | 2 | 0.0117 |
| #5 | SamSam | 1 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mizzu | 101 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #2 | TweeZ | 73 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #3 | NaystyX | 45 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #4 | ♛King♛ | 25 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | KasinonKuningas | 18 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TweeZ | +5.62 | 84 | 73 |
| #2 | NaystyX | +5.03 | 78 | 54 |
| #3 | Mizzu | +2.38 | 71 | 43 |
| #4 | KasinonKuningas | +0.46 | 77 | 38 |
| #5 | SamSam | -0.10 | 73 | 60 |





