








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 171 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
843 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,185 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 680 | 16% |
| Smokes | 1544 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 1051 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 910 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $441,187 of utility $161 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 127 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ED | 69% | 13 |
| #2 | Alejandro | 55% | 11 |
| #3 | NaystyX | 47% | 32 |
| #4 | Mizzu | 46% | 93 |
| #5 | KasinonKuningas | 44% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mizzu | 54 | 0.0284 |
| #2 | NaystyX | 15 | 0.0220 |
| #3 | KasinonKuningas | 11 | 0.0109 |
| #4 | Alejandro | 6 | 0.0262 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mizzu | 206 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #2 | NaystyX | 114 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #3 | KasinonKuningas | 73 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | ED | 48 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #5 | Alejandro | 46 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NaystyX | +4.23 | 71 | 57 |
| #2 | Mizzu | +1.71 | 65 | 48 |
| #3 | ED | +0.49 | 69 | 43 |
| #4 | KasinonKuningas | -0.50 | 72 | 44 |
| #5 | skuul | -0.65 | 63 | 51 |





