








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1327 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 918 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9178 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 30,631 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8576 | 28% |
| Smokes | 8293 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 5432 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 8330 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,720,476 of utility $137 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 599 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tox1c | 62% | 74 |
| #2 | >synchron!ze. | 59% | 183 |
| #3 | hanK | 55% | 95 |
| #4 | RHYTHMX | 54% | 300 |
| #5 | Monkey D. Luffy | 52% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RHYTHMX | 42 | 0.0069 |
| #2 | >synchron!ze. | 12 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Ajnabee (Woof) | 10 | 0.0037 |
| #4 | JoJo | 7 | 0.0042 |
| #5 | hanK | 4 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RHYTHMX | 609 | 0.10 | 15 min |
| #2 | Ajnabee (Woof) | 556 | 0.21 | 14 min |
| #3 | hanK | 426 | 0.21 | 9 min |
| #4 | >synchron!ze. | 359 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #5 | Tox1c | 356 | 0.23 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tox1c | +2.29 | 68 | 68 |
| #2 | >synchron!ze. | +1.69 | 79 | 53 |
| #3 | JoJo | +1.31 | 56 | 61 |
| #4 | hanK | +1.05 | 60 | 68 |
| #5 | RHYTHMX | +0.91 | 86 | 57 |





