








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 897 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 385 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




74 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4669 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,218 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3810 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4051 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 3072 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2285 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,348,821 of utility $141 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 672 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sdc | 53% | 95 |
| #2 | Kingston | 50% | 185 |
| #3 | Jordanfall | 48% | 378 |
| #4 | RREALETH | 46% | 207 |
| #5 | SlayNugget | 46% | 184 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Kingston | 50% | 185 |
| #3 | Jordanfall | 48% | 378 |
| #4 | RREALETH | 46% | 207 |
| #5 | SlayNugget | 46% | 184 |
| #6 | jark walk em down | 42% | 92 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jordanfall | 147 | 0.0183 |
| #2 | SlayNugget | 26 | 0.0066 |
| #3 | RREALETH | 23 | 0.0052 |
| #4 | jark walk em down | 19 | 0.0096 |
| #5 | Kingston | 7 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jordanfall | 649 | 0.08 | 13 min |
| #2 | SlayNugget | 632 | 0.16 | 15 min |
| #3 | sdc | 393 | 0.20 | 10 min |
| #4 | Kingston | 358 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #5 | RREALETH | 288 | 0.06 | 8 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | noahhh | +1.76 | 80 | 58 |
| #2 | sdc | +1.10 | 81 | 61 |
| #3 | SlayNugget | +0.56 | 60 | 58 |
| #4 | Jordanfall | +0.02 | 54 | 45 |
| #5 | RREALETH | -0.75 | 73 | 50 |





