








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 693 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 273 matches | ||
| Wingman | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2917 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,873 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2975 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1968 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 3193 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2737 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,027,219 of utility $128 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 380 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RaFHATCent | 15 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | jonttusetä | 4 | 0.0008 |
| #3 | EJR | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | Simo | 4 | 0.0040 |
| #5 | Dovasi | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EJR | 501 | 0.19 | 17 min |
| #2 | RaFHATCent | 343 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #3 | Dovasi | 297 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #4 | jonttusetä | 235 | 0.05 | 7 min |
| #5 | pulik :3 | 146 | 0.15 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Simo | +2.40 | 77 | 63 |
| #2 | EJR | +2.33 | 68 | 73 |
| #3 | Dovasi | +1.04 | 61 | 62 |
| #4 | TATA COAL TRUCK | +0.40 | 74 | 60 |
| #5 | jonttusetä | +0.21 | 66 | 64 |





