








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 121 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1048 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,774 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 672 | 24% |
| Smokes | 761 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 600 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 741 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $522,590 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Whipler | 55% | 33 |
| #2 | TomatoSlammer | 47% | 19 |
| #3 | GoonMaxer6000 | 47% | 133 |
| #4 | gurrrken | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Whipler | 55% | 33 |
| #2 | TomatoSlammer | 47% | 19 |
| #3 | GoonMaxer6000 | 47% | 133 |
| #4 | gurrrken | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GoonMaxer6000 | 9 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | Whipler | 3 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | gurrrken | 1 | 0.0064 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GoonMaxer6000 | 130 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | Whipler | 80 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #3 | gurrrken | 20 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #4 | TomatoSlammer | 19 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | GoonMaxer6000 | +1.88 | 54 | 46 |
| #2 | Whipler | -0.14 | 36 | 56 |
| #3 | gurrrken | -0.84 | 57 | 43 |
| #4 | TomatoSlammer | -2.07 | 5 | 36 |
| #5 | JIMMIE | -2.25 | 60 | 50 |





