










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 215 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 106 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 74 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




99 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4716 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,298 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1718 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2037 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2438 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 1105 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,654,637 of utility $206 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 546 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Emo∿ | 67% | 39 |
| #2 | VioletSkyy | 56% | 124 |
| #3 | fart | 54% | 72 |
| #4 | Sara Lynn's Pills | 49% | 71 |
| #5 | ImBag | 48% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Emo∿ | +5.36 | 74 | 63 |
| #2 | Bell | +2.21 | 32 | 36 |
| #3 | ImBag | +0.81 | 56 | 31 |
| #4 | fart | +0.63 | 48 | 28 |
| #5 | Jrolles | +0.43 | 52 | 40 |





