








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 94 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 228 matches | ||
| Premier | 86 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4688 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,836 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4995 | 32% |
| Smokes | 4406 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3457 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2978 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $690,079 of utility $85 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 81 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noname | 56% | 118 |
| #2 | Αττίλας | 55% | 78 |
| #3 | s4f4R1; | 53% | 222 |
| #4 | Rudas | 51% | 156 |
| #5 | Apró | 48% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Rudas | 51% | 156 |
| #5 | Apró | 48% | 65 |
| #6 | Marcus | 47% | 43 |
| #7 | Sinya` | 45% | 80 |
| #8 | ✪ SkyGod.- | 44% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Noname | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #2 | Apró | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rudas | 377 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #2 | s4f4R1; | 278 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #3 | Sinya` | 271 | 0.16 | 6 min |
| #4 | Noname | 270 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #5 | Αττίλας | 111 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | steveemeisteR >.< | +3.09 | 79 | 63 |
| #2 | Αττίλας | +1.58 | 73 | 55 |
| #3 | Marcus | +0.08 | 68 | 60 |
| #4 | Noname | -0.37 | 69 | 73 |
| #5 | ✪ SkyGod.- | -0.77 | 72 | 40 |





