








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1857 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September






The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 1375 matches | ||
| Premier | 60 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




331 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
18871 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 72,918 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 12831 | 18% |
| Smokes | 25755 | 35% |
| HE Grenades | 17077 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 17255 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,898,018 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9707 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Local Waffle House Crackhead | 57% | 94 |
| #2 | TheBossMan_14 | 40% | 204 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Local Waffle House Crackhead | 57% | 94 |
| #2 | TheBossMan_14 | 40% | 204 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheBossMan_14 | 36 | 0.0087 |
| #2 | Local Waffle House Crackhead | 9 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheBossMan_14 | 148 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| #2 | Local Waffle House Crackhead | 117 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Local Waffle House Crackhead | +4.49 | 73 | 41 |
| #2 | stromboli | +1.44 | 26 | 63 |
| #3 | TheBossMan_14 | -4.50 | 30 | 26 |





