








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 299 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 71 matches | ||
| Wingman | 69 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1609 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,709 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2292 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1748 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 1938 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1731 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $398,995 of utility $94 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 156 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chris | 67% | 15 |
| #2 | el jefe | 57% | 23 |
| #3 | Cr1msonB0mber | 50% | 18 |
| #4 | Sonne | 48% | 58 |
| #5 | NuGa_6 | 48% | 23 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sonne | 5 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | el jefe | 4 | 0.0093 |
| #3 | Cr1msonB0mber | 3 | 0.0081 |
| #4 | d00f | 2 | 0.0017 |
| #5 | El Papi | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sonne | 150 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | d00f | 93 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | Cr1msonB0mber | 62 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | Chris | 38 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | el jefe | 30 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | el jefe | +4.91 | 81 | 52 |
| #2 | Chris | +2.57 | 75 | 59 |
| #3 | Sonne | +1.77 | 79 | 65 |
| #4 | El Papi | +1.55 | 62 | 39 |
| #5 | Håldme | -0.17 | 60 | 62 |





