








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 382 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 154 matches | ||
| Faceit | 69 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3545 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,683 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3703 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3625 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2964 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 3391 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $475,465 of utility $72 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 958 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Lieszaaaa | 58% | 19 |
| #6 | Joanana | 58% | 76 |
| #7 | jenblob | 53% | 40 |
| #8 | kRYSTEN | 47% | 17 |
| #9 | meli | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shitty game | 14 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | meli | 5 | 0.0125 |
| #3 | ayez | 4 | 0.0056 |
| #4 | Lieszaaaa | 3 | 0.0072 |
| #5 | Joanana | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shitty game | 462 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #2 | Joanana | 305 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #3 | ayez | 151 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #4 | Spike | 127 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #5 | jenblob | 114 | 0.16 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ayez | +2.25 | 76 | 56 |
| #2 | Luna | +1.74 | 82 | 70 |
| #3 | Shitty game | +1.35 | 83 | 67 |
| #4 | Lieszaaaa | +1.22 | 70 | 57 |
| #5 | kRYSTEN | +0.90 | 93 | 64 |





