








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 142 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
291 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 703 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 98 | 14% |
| Smokes | 155 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 255 | 36% |
| Molotovs | 195 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $142,145 of utility $217 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 163 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Richi_ | 68% | 31 |
| #2 | szsmix | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | cat | 63% | 16 |
| #4 | chealsa | 61% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Richi_ | 68% | 31 |
| #2 | szsmix | 65% | 23 |
| #3 | cat | 63% | 16 |
| #4 | chealsa | 61% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cat | 9 | 0.0287 |
| #2 | Richi_ | 5 | 0.0076 |
| #3 | chealsa | 3 | 0.0080 |
| #4 | szsmix | 1 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | szsmix | 71 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | Richi_ | 39 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #3 | chealsa | 39 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #4 | cat | 22 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | szsmix | +3.84 | 81 | 70 |
| #2 | cat | +0.14 | 61 | 47 |
| #3 | Richi_ | +0.03 | 44 | 66 |
| #4 | SkaņaTekila | -0.19 | 85 | 47 |
| #5 | chealsa | -4.09 | 71 | 56 |





