








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 500 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 73 matches | ||
| Premier | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1114 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,607 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1183 | 33% |
| Smokes | 713 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 817 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 894 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $467,511 of utility $66 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 288 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StarLight King | 64% | 25 |
| #2 | Syzprex | 50% | 50 |
| #3 | Vanessa | 46% | 28 |
| #4 | Coco5201 | 45% | 31 |
| #5 | LTK | 42% | 85 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LTK | 21 | 0.0129 |
| #2 | kirstine729 | 13 | 0.0030 |
| #3 | Amodio | 10 | 0.0035 |
| #4 | Coco5201 | 9 | 0.0161 |
| #5 | Syzprex | 8 | 0.0080 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LTK | 395 | 0.24 | 10 min |
| #2 | kirstine729 | 187 | 0.04 | 4 min |
| #3 | Amodio | 80 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #4 | Syzprex | 77 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | Coco5201 | 55 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Syzprex | +12.74 | 90 | 53 |
| #2 | LTK | +6.21 | 73 | 57 |
| #3 | Coco5201 | +4.41 | 90 | 39 |
| #4 | StarLight King | +3.30 | 54 | 45 |
| #5 | Vanessa | +1.69 | 73 | 34 |





