








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 115 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Office | 40 matches | ||
| Premier | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




107 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3018 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,312 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 486 | 15% |
| Smokes | 117 | 4% |
| HE Grenades | 1120 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1589 | 48% |
Our logs show you have wasted $680,215 of utility $115 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 238 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FishStick | 66 | 0.0128 |
| #2 | DINKleberg | 34 | 0.0069 |
| #3 | 8bit- | 24 | 0.0190 |
| #4 | Beetie | 10 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | DTF Reaper | 6 | 0.0067 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DINKleberg | 658 | 0.13 | 16 min |
| #2 | FishStick | 394 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #3 | 8bit- | 69 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | SnekTheLad | 54 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #5 | DTF Reaper | 32 | 0.04 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DINKleberg | +2.69 | 81 | 61 |
| #2 | 8bit- | +1.85 | 58 | 62 |
| #3 | Dixxie | +0.91 | 71 | 36 |
| #4 | DTF Reaper | -0.82 | 62 | 41 |
| #5 | FishStick | -1.93 | 67 | 45 |





