








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 16 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
252 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 239 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 64 | 27% |
| Smokes | 37 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 134 | 56% |
| Molotovs | 4 | 2% |
Our logs show you have wasted $92,963 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mify | 61% | 36 |
| #2 | xp. | 59% | 37 |
| #3 | upper | 59% | 27 |
| #4 | SolandMoon | 57% | 23 |
| #5 | acua | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mify | 61% | 36 |
| #2 | xp. | 59% | 37 |
| #3 | upper | 59% | 27 |
| #4 | SolandMoon | 57% | 23 |
| #5 | acua | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | upper | 16 | 0.0336 |
| #2 | xp. | 13 | 0.0193 |
| #3 | mify | 7 | 0.0108 |
| #4 | SolandMoon | 3 | 0.0074 |
| #5 | acua | 2 | 0.0385 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mify | 53 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #2 | SolandMoon | 51 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #3 | upper | 16 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | xp. | 8 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| #5 | acua | 4 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mify | +3.88 | 79 | 46 |
| #2 | xp. | +3.10 | 76 | 18 |
| #3 | upper | +0.70 | 60 | 17 |
| #4 | SolandMoon | +0.08 | 84 | 32 |
| #5 | acua | -2.15 | 93 | 6 |





