










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 717 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 118 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




62 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2363 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,176 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 580 | 27% |
| Smokes | 626 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 602 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 368 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $735,743 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 599 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | FLYSCOPE SovietBatman | 77% | 13 |
| #2 | shimo | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | kura | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | upper | 55% | 38 |
| #5 | wings | 55% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | puck | 21 | 0.0236 |
| #2 | upper | 14 | 0.0189 |
| #3 | !!!!!!!!!!!! | 10 | 0.0099 |
| #4 | xp. | 9 | 0.0291 |
| #5 | FLYSCOPE SovietBatman | 2 | 0.0077 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | !!!!!!!!!!!! | 212 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| #2 | puck | 116 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | kura | 78 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #4 | wings | 49 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #5 | shimo | 43 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | acua | +2.98 | 93 | 31 |
| #2 | xp. | +2.34 | 84 | 10 |
| #3 | !!!!!!!!!!!! | +2.20 | 93 | 33 |
| #4 | ♡ sip ♡ | +0.81 | 32 | 51 |
| #5 | kura | +0.81 | 67 | 68 |





