








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1 achievement has been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 46 matches | ||
| Faceit | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
900 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,596 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 554 | 21% |
| Smokes | 893 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 567 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 582 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $227,737 of utility $122 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 101 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | twist | 73% | 11 |
| #2 | vano-_- | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | trg | 67% | 24 |
| #4 | moomin | 60% | 43 |
| #5 | slyzak | 58% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Joker <3 K LFT | 22% | 18 |
| #9 | 𝓟𝔂𝓣𝓮𝓧 | 21% | 14 |
| #10 | Kirt | 20% | 5 |
| #11 | warden0sS | 20% | 15 |
| #12 | 王怡人 | 18% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝓟𝔂𝓣𝓮𝓧 | 6 | 0.0214 |
| #2 | Joker <3 K LFT | 4 | 0.0114 |
| #3 | trg | 3 | 0.0066 |
| #4 | warden0sS | 3 | 0.0100 |
| #5 | moomin | 2 | 0.0024 |





