










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 95 matches | ||
| Premier | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




58 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1347 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,312 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 837 | 36% |
| Smokes | 247 | 11% |
| HE Grenades | 799 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 429 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $839,330 of utility $271 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 499 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aya | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | do you like waffles? | 73% | 44 |
| #3 | temu cart got me boyvulating | 64% | 117 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aya | 80% | 15 |
| #2 | do you like waffles? | 73% | 44 |
| #3 | temu cart got me boyvulating | 64% | 117 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | temu cart got me boyvulating | 40 | 0.0183 |
| #2 | do you like waffles? | 11 | 0.0130 |
| #3 | Aya | 1 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | temu cart got me boyvulating | 468 | 0.21 | 13 min |
| #2 | do you like waffles? | 75 | 0.09 | 2 min |
| #3 | Aya | 22 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aya | +5.14 | 93 | 42 |
| #2 | do you like waffles? | +4.98 | 63 | 51 |
| #3 | temu cart got me boyvulating | +3.29 | 58 | 72 |
| #4 | michael | +0.46 | 62 | 39 |





