








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 496 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 34 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 19 matches | ||
| Faceit | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 136 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3419 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,519 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4441 | 31% |
| Smokes | 3828 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 3286 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2964 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,500,110 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 205 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PERTZ- | 55% | 75 |
| #2 | Raven | 53% | 34 |
| #3 | 𝙎𝙔𝙑𝙊 | 50% | 133 |
| #4 | Kimble._ | 48% | 159 |
| #5 | anianus | 47% | 98 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #9 | Miggerlangelo | 42% | 251 |
| #10 | Slouger | 39% | 33 |
| #11 | Temssii | 38% | 76 |
| #12 | Oaxy | 38% | 69 |
| #13 | Heskaa | 34% | 90 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hattivatti | 20 | 0.0028 |
| #2 | SÄÄTÖ-SALE | 17 | 0.0047 |
| #3 | anianus | 15 | 0.0082 |
| #4 | Heskaa | 7 | 0.0039 |
| #5 | Raven | 7 | 0.0106 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hattivatti | 789 | 0.11 | 18 min |
| #2 | Kimble._ | 424 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #3 | SÄÄTÖ-SALE | 359 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #4 | Miggerlangelo | 336 | 0.07 | 10 min |
| #5 | PERTZ- | 296 | 0.21 | 10 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PERTZ- | +5.92 | 83 | 70 |
| #2 | anianus | +4.25 | 86 | 62 |
| #3 | Raven | +2.21 | 70 | 74 |
| #4 | 𝙎𝙔𝙑𝙊 | +1.82 | 87 | 46 |
| #5 | Kimble._ | +1.80 | 66 | 60 |





