








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 319 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 296 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 49 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 53 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




28 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3596 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,451 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3298 | 23% |
| Smokes | 4031 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 4220 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2902 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $334,929 of utility $32 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 359 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | demi | 59% | 27 |
| #2 | ShitzuZera | 56% | 61 |
| #3 | danielito el matador | 53% | 30 |
| #4 | Guzzz | 51% | 55 |
| #5 | -xLIGHTx- | 48% | 46 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ cabeça | 338 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #2 | O Perez ◥◣◢◤ | 317 | 0.33 | 9 min |
| #3 | ♣️Maracuja_Smoking☯ | 306 | 0.08 | 8 min |
| #4 | Eiki | 253 | 0.36 | 7 min |
| #5 | ShitzuZera | 175 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | danielito el matador | +6.80 | 76 | 71 |
| #2 | ♣️Maracuja_Smoking☯ | +2.49 | 64 | 56 |
| #3 | O Perez ◥◣◢◤ | +2.39 | 65 | 73 |
| #4 | LÉO BATE PISTÃO | +2.36 | 46 | 61 |
| #5 | Chiba | +2.12 | 67 | 38 |





